Sunday, August 9, 2009

In Which Everyone Does Not Help Me Clean The House

Today was rather an exercise in futility as far as getting anything done around the house went. The excitement started early; I heard a crash in the office at about two in the morning and (armed with my trusty machete) ran down the hall to check it out. I found a chagrined lump of a tabby cat underneath a mound of yellow fabric on the floor. Apparently Loki thought climbing up the curtains might be an innovative new way to get to the windowsill. It didn't work very well. So now my new curtains are leaning up in a corner waiting for me to reenforce the holders so they don't rip out of the walls again.

On the way back to my room after the curtain incident (I refrained from using the machete on the cat, so you should all be proud) I stopped by Connor's room to check up on him, only to discover he had pulled his medicine intake valve open again and there was formula all over the bed. I changed out his sheets and attempted to go back to sleep. Connor, unhappy at being disturbed from his (undoubtedly soggy) dreams, began crying. When Connor cries he forgets to swallow and ends up coughing and ultimately, if there is anything in his stomach, throwing up, which is what he did when I walked in and picked him up out of his crib, christening my hair, robe, and his formally clean sheets. Since he was out of sheets, he finished the night out with a blanket over the mattress.

When I woke up this morning I walked into the living room to discover that Loki had found the dried lavender in the vase on the dining room table and, in protest at being out of food, shredded it with his teeth. There were little mutilated lavender bits ground all over the tablecloth, chairs and carpet. Our upstairs neighbors had thrown their beer cans in my garden again. The sink backed up. I looked out the window just as a flock of ducks used my car for target practice. Their aim was dead on.

I'm not sure why all of the sudden everyone in this house thinks I need help getting everything messy. I can do that perfectly well by myself, thank you very much.

Some days are like that, I guess.



Julia said...

I would say, "It never rains, it pours," but that might be too reminiscent of the duck incident. Good luck with the house, and I hope you catch a break soon.

leah said...

I always thought a flushing house would be a good idea. When things just got too out of hand, you could just flush and have everything clean again...

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